I decided to venture alone to the grocery store today.  I know: I look danger in the face and I laugh.

Well, until I tried to actually get in the grocery store.  The entrance is a little bit difficult to explain, but I’ll try.  There is a regular door, the big sliding glass door that’s pretty standard for such establishments, but then right after there is a second set of glass doors, more like the kind of barriers you get at subway stations.  Whenever I’ve entered the store before with the Viking, both sets of doors open at the same time, and you just walk on through like you’ve been entering grocery stores all your life.

However, this is me and I was on my own so of course the big glass door opened, but the little glass barrier did not.  And then the big glass door shut behind me…

And I was trapped.   In a little glass cage at the entrance of a grocery story.

I tried to back out, but the big doors wouldn’t open again.  I tried going forwards, but the little barrier wouldn’t open.

I stared helplessly at a store full of Swedes just beyond the barrier, all going about their grocery shopping apparently completely unaware that there was a stupid American trapped in a glass box.

Of course I understand that these doors open on sensors, and presumably the sensors of the little barrier hadn’t picked me up for some reason (too short?!) so I tried waving.  Self consciously at first, who wants people to see them trapped in a glass box waving?  But of course little self conscious waves do not open barriers, so I waved bigger.  Then I jumped up and down.  Then I waved while jumping up and down.  Nothing.

I was seriously starting to think I was going to have to live there, when a man entered the store behind me.  Naturally the big glass doors opened for him, so I turned to him and said, “any ideas?” gesturing at the little barriers.

He said, “it’s to do with your credibility as a person.”

Then waved (of course he was eight feet tall) at the sensors and lo and behold, the little barriers opened and I was free to enter the world of the grocery store!

I know I said before that I’m not a fan of this dry, sometimes harsh, Swedish humor; but that was a good one.