Part of the reason that I had hoped to have plans with SAG this weekend, was that there was a house party I hoped to get out of. Even though things are looking up with the THM, I didn’t want to push it (or spend that much time with them, if I’m honest). The party was at the apartment of another friend I hadn’t met yet, but I knew that the Monster would be out in force. However, in the name of positive energy and neutrality and whatnot, I decided to look on it as an opportunity to meet some new people outside of the inner sanctum, and by the time we arrived was pretty psyched to kick back and party.

I guess whether or not it was a good night depends on whether or not ignorance is bliss.

First off, Asterix was wasted. And I don’t mean, hey it’s Saturday and no one’s driving buzzed, I mean wasted. I mean, teenagers hiding in the woods behind someone’s house with a keg, then wanting to die for almost a week afterwards wasted. I have literally never seen someone in their 30s in that state. But then, whatever, he’s a grown man, he wasn’t driving, I have drunk with him on several occasions and never seen him like that so I don’t have any reason to think he has a problem.

All the same, that was the context to what happened:

I had just tripped over this giant pile of shoes by the front door (what is it with Swedes and removing their shoes in other people’s homes?!) when he stumbled into the wall right next to me, and asked what I was doing. I said I was looking for the Viking and he said, “do you think he is hiding under the shoes?” He’s a hoot, that dude. Anyway, I started to walk away when he suddenly blurted out that I was really great and he was happy I had come to Sweden. I was kind of taken aback, so just said, “thanks” or whatever, then he leaned down to look really intently at me, and continued that it was really great to see the Viking so happy.

That’s a pretty standard thing to say to someone’s new girlfriend of course, but there was something about his tone and how intensely he was staring at me that made me… not uncomfortable or anything, but feel like he was saying more than he was actually saying. I kind of grinned and shrugged and said something stupid like, “just doing my job!” and then we were semi interrupted by some drunk guys crashing through the hallway and nearly squishing us against the wall. I took the opportunity to be like, “okay, see ya!” but Asterix was still talking. He was kind of slurring by this point, but he seemed to be mumbling something about how great Anders is and how he thought he would never see him happy again, but I made him happy – or something, I literally caught every couple of words, but that’s what I gathered. I think. At this point, I just wanted to get out of there, and Asterix was practically talking to himself anyway, so I just ducked and ran to the kitchen.

I joined a random group by the drinks table, and the good thing about not speaking the language was that I could just smile and nod and pretend I was listening, while really Asterix’s words were buzzing round my head. I’ve talked before about the Viking’s reluctance to share and how I was mildly concerned that he wouldn’t tell me even basic things about his past, but I never truly thought that he was hiding something specific.

It seems like there’s something specific that happened that Asterix was talking about, right? When I was lying awake thinking about it, I wondered if he could just mean that he thought he wouldn’t find someone and be happy, but I’m almost positive I heard “happy again,” like there was a particular time he was unhappy. But then also, like I said, Asterix was Wasted with a capital W, what if he was just slurring random crap (don’t forget we were talking a foreign language for him)? Of course the answer is to talk to the Viking, but given how that conversation went last time I tried it, I’m reluctant to push him based on drunken ramblings I don’t even know if I heard right.